Monday, January 28, 2008

did you know there is a difference between a dresser and a chest of drawers?

so the lord of the ring and i made one bold step closer to being actual adults and bought a dresser.

a real dresser. a new dresser.

i wonder if i took a poll of my generation how many would say they don't actually have a dresser? not something that is actually meant to be used as something else, but a real dresser?

anyhow, to achieve this we had to go to the furniture store. furniture stores are slightly weird in that they ARE HUMONGOUS and eerily silent. practically deserted, yet filled to the rafters with whole "rooms" set up and decorated within an inch of their lives.

and just so you know, i looked and looked and looked on craigslist and in consignment stores and goodwill to find a used dresser to no avail. not only was i not successful in my attempt, i have never seen so many ugly ass dirty pieces of furniture in my life.

so, that's the reason for the trip to the furniture store.

and the reason for this explanation is that buying brand new never been used by someone else furniture feels very odd. like i'm getting away with something i shouldn't be. like somewhere someone is recording this in my permanent carbon footprint file.

anyway, it was just our luck we got the resident bitch for our sales person.

"are you looking at the dresser or the chest of drawers?"

"oh, i didn't realize they were called different things"

"mm. well. they are."

and she gives me that look that you have to be in your late 50's and bitter to perfect.

so she gets us all rung up and whatnot and somehow it comes up that we home school. she seems surprised by this. then she proceeds to put her hand over mine and leans in and says

"no offense, but aren't the schools on the island good enough for you?"

"well, the voices in my head tell me they aren't"

okay, so i didn't say that. but only because i didn't think of it until later.

what a bitch.

i did say

"well, first of all we don't live on the island so i wouldn't know about the schools. and second of all this isn't about the schools, it's about the best decision for our family"

and i can't stand when someone says "no offense" because what they might as well be saying is "i am now going to be offensive. brace yourself"

when i find myself explaining myself to complete idiots it always makes me feel cheapened in some way.

i just wish i could remember that "why, that's none of your business now is it?" is perfectly acceptable and i daresay more than called for in some circumstances.

in the meantime, besides propelling us to adulthood, the dresser also means i have to fold my clothes and put them away and no longer have an excuse not to.




Veloute said...

So...what *is* the difference?

I have a dresser (or whatever), but only because my grandmother passed it down to me. Now I have no idea what it is really called.

You should have said that about the voices in your head.

Ramblings of a Neopets Obsessed Art said...

You really should have used the line about the voices!!! How funny. Anyways, I'm 41 and have never bought a dresser or chest of drawers new. I do have one I'd gotten second hand. Happily, I've managed yo get this far in life without knowing the difference. And don't worry, none of that stuff is going to stay folded for long. I'm just happy if the drawers close!