we were all up quite early this morning...mainly to get the lord of the ring to the bus, but the duke was up wayyy before that, and as a result, so was i...
okay, like ten minutes before we had to, but that's TEN MINUTES I COULD HAVE USED!
it's monday, and we're tired...school started off swimmingly enough until we got to grammar...for some reason during our lesson on contractions the duke could not retain the information that the little mark that fills in for missing letters is called an apostrophe...and he already knew that...it's old hat...
so we get to the part where he's reciting back to me how to spell and write a contraction and he keeps forgetting the word "apostrophe"...
i'm getting frustrated and all of a sudden i just burst...
"it's called an apostrophe!"
and then i take the pencil and write the word in big bold letters spelling it out loud as i go, for emphasis...okay, out of pure frustration...but as a result of my totally regressive snit, it was emphasized...
i look at the duke he says okay and we move on...
that's when i noticed i spelled it wrong...apostraphe is what i wrote in big bold letters across the page so um, maturely...
sigh...
did i mention it's monday?...and i got up really really really early?...
on a brighter note, wingman is now peeing in the potty and wearing underwear!...i am thrilled and relieved!...anyone who knows me well as a parent knows that potty training has been one of the biggest "issues" for me...i know *they* always say "well don't worry, nobody ever goes to the prom in diapers!", but it was never of any relief...because when it comes to my boys and their indifference/reticence towards learning to use the potty, i would just think "well hell, by then they'd probably learn to hold it really well so they could get through the prom and just grab a diaper when they got home!"...
so to actually have two boys in underwear and successfully using the potty (well, halfway there anyway) takes a major weight off my shoulders...
he peed in the potty for the first time once on thursday night...refused the underwear and had no more to do with the potty till he went twice on sunday...then this morning when he was getting dressed he said yes to the underwear, has peed twice in the potty, and as of this moment still has dry underwear!...
see, the great thing about being a mom is that you yourself don't really have to accomplish anything!...if you let nature take it's course, milestones will be met and when you announce the completion of said milestones then it appears as if you are doing something...
brilliant, huh?...
actually, i do clean the potty afterwards, and i did have to teach wingman the little shake thing at the end (how do i even know that?), which do count as doing something, but those are far less glamorous "somethings" to be sure...and to announce them to a lot of people would be weird...don't you think?...as if i'm searching for validation for the mundane and obscure tasks i have to perform like oh i don't know FIFTY MILLION TIMES A DAY WITH NO VALIDATION FOR MY EFFORT WHATSOEVER!...WITH NO PAYCHECK! NO 401K! NO LUNCH BREAK! AND FER DAMN SURE NO CHRISTMAS BONUS!...I WANT TO GO TO THE BATHROOM BY MYSELF AND WEAR SOMETHING RESEMBLING A PUT TOGETHER OUTFIT AND NOT FEEL AS THOUGH EVERY DAY IS CASUAL FRICKIN' FRIDAY AT SOME TWO-BIT-NOTHING-BETTER-THAN-A-GARAGE-SALE THRIFT STORE!...
anyhow...
with only three pairs of underwear to his name, wingman insists that he will need more and we must pay a visit to target...TODAY!...alright, i can handle that...problem is, the last time we were there they were out of thomas the tank engine underwear, and the only other pack of underwear he was really favoring just happened to be girl's underwear...
sure, they were winnie the pooh, who is basically non-gender specific...BUT, the scalloped lace edges and bow in the front are decidedly gender specific...and while i'm an open minded sort who would actually get him the underwear he picks, i am SO not going to for one reason...years from now when he's lying on the therapist's couch while his childhood is being systematically dissected i plan on having my name come up as LITTLE as possible...
so there you have it...monday with the sillymortals...
i figure i have roughly 5, 475 days of doing this job full time left...give or take a few days...and when i switch to on-call part time, i might think about switching careers, too...maybe something in plastics...
x.
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