go green and gold.

so my 20th high school reunion is coming up. i know, right? just makes you suck your own stomach in hearing about it.

while it seemed like just talk before, now there's an actual website, a link to a facebook group with pictures of my former classmates who are interested in attending.

as an aside, can i say that i'm not on facebook. and after browsing these pictures in the reunion group, and clicking on their "friends" to get to other "friends" i've basically managed to get somewhat of an update on anybody i ever liked, disliked, slept with, or married in that town.

click click click OMG! six degrees of separation my ass. facebook scares the hell out of me. i may never recover.

first of all i don't recognize over HALF the people on the reunion site. by name OR by face. and second of all when did all the people i went to high school with get so old?

i mean, i'm not old, why are they old?

it's a curious thing, this idea of reunion. for one night you gather and exchange, check out and reconnect, or mock, or whatever, all the while realizing that if you met these people on the street today you would not be friends let alone acquaintances let alone gather for drinks and appetizers.

not to mention paying hundreds of dollars for travel and hotel room and venue expenses for the privilege.

but because you were thrown together for four years of your life, for some the best, for some the worst, a lifetime ago, now there's some kind of duty to see those relationships through? at least every ten years or so after until. you. die? say it isn't so!

in some ways it's kind of sweet and nostalgic.

in other ways it's totally fubar. seriously. what a completely fucked up idea, right?

and OF COURSE i totally want to go. like a moth to the flame.

the other day, regarding this very event, one dear friend said to the goddess mother, (both of whom i met in high school and am now attached to for life, but in the best possible way)

"why do we want to go? just to see how badly every one turned out?"

um, yeah.

isn't that the point! what better reason i say!

it's certainly not to bask in how well some people are doing. how fit they are! how fabulous their skin looks! how glamorous their job sounds!

nobody wants to see that. we want to see the blood, the gore, the stretch marks, and the pot bellies.

look, i'm no prize. i mean *i* think i am, but according to reunion standards probably not. i'm not remotely the same size i was in high school, which something tells me is something one is supposed to care about in anticipation of attending this sort of event, and i don't exactly have the sort of occupation that people would rave about or envy. i mean, again, *i* think i do, but mostly when people think of superpowers they don't think "make me a stay at home, home schooling mother of two!"

BUT

i am happy with my life. i'm actually doing exactly what i want to be doing. and i still have dreams yet to fulfill, other lives to live in this lifetime. it's pretty sweet actually, and i even feel a leetle sorry for other people sometimes.

so, i'm good with me. i can go and withstand the scrutiny because i like who i am and where i'm at and i wouldn't change it for the world.

plus, with the right foundation garments, some well timed and well placed distractions, and the soft focus lens, i still look really really good in a pair of jeans.

KApow!

x.