Monday, May 21, 2007

raaack! polly *does* want a cracker as long as it comes with a bottle of wine.

so the lord of the ring and i have been thinking for awhile now how we can get a little place in the city...any city fer' cryin' out loud!!!...

really, though, with two kids homeschooling next year and my wanting to go back to school it would be beneficial to be more urban...a dream, but we're optimistic...

so, we were talking about some options the other night and we were agreeing that a two bedroom would be okay, but in order for him to have a workable home office a three bedroom would be ideal...and that generally a three bedroom place would have more overall square footage, which we both agreed was a great idea...then the duke said all nonchalant

"yeah, 'cuz i'm gonna need room for my birdcage"

oh good lord what now?

apparently, the duke of fun is planning on getting a bird...not just any bird...first he was lobbying for two parakeets...and then it came down to it and what he really wants is an african grey parrot...

possibly the most time intensive pet around...they live 50-80 years, need a minimum of three hours of outside the cage time a day, one hour of exercise a day, a wide variety of interesting toys which they will attack and get bored with easily, water changed frequently during the day because of bacteria risk, special diet, supplements, air filter and humidifier by the cage are suggested, at least 12 hours but 14 are ideal of sound sleep a night or they get grumpy, and they need to be bathed at least once a week...

yeah, and did i mention they live 50-80 years?...

oh, and they talk...not just any talking...they eventually get to a point where they can string sentences together and respond to you conversationally...they are also expert at mimicking any noise they hear...they are also sensitive and emotional and do not like being left alone...especially if you go somewhere or if you are sitting down to a meal...

good lord!...i didn't say this but he might as well wait to get married!!!...ha ha, i keed i keed...

one quote i especially liked was

"You don't know a scream until you've heard your African Grey scream bloody murder at his toys. Which they do quite often in play."

ohhhhh, greaaaaatttt. LOVELY.

seriously, you've got to be freakin' kidding me!...he got some books from the library so he's well aware of all this...and we discussed in very. full. detail. about how papa and i are not willing to care for his bird long term should he go away to college or extensive traveling...hell, i need to go away to college and do extensive traveling!

this means i will never fully totally be alone in my own home...ever...whatever i did in a past life it must have been really bad and i am so very sorry...

the real kicker and what may save us all is the fact that they roughly run about $900 bucks a bird...not including the cage and the toys and the food and all that...

the lord of the ring and i told him that we thought he was too young to really know about that kind of commitment now, but if he saved up $1000 for expenses likely by that time he'd be old enough to make a better informed decision...

man. the duke is a fine boy, the BEST!, but seriously?...a bird like that suggests a level of nuts that i just don't think i've encountered yet in my family...and believe me, i've had plenty of encountering...

and *right* after that discussion as i was tucking wingman into bed and turning off the lamp and walking out the door so bloody thankful that he was finally in bed for the day one down one to go and looking forward to switching off my brain he asked

"who was jesus?"

i love the fact that my children cannot comprehend just how close to the edge i really am at all times...i certainly wouldn't want them to tone down their boybarianess in favor of my sanity...

OH, and i totally blocked this out but remember baseball mom from last week?...well at the beginning of that whole "you called my mother a feminist and now you shall pay with my wrath you heathen!" conversation i learned a very interesting fact...

SHE VOTED DOWN THE LIBRARY LEVY LIFT!

so *that's* who would vote against the library, huh?...sounds about right...i can't believe i forgot that when i was posting about it last week...

probably had something to do with the fact that i was still upset that the levy did. not. pass.

that's right, it wasn't *just* her but a little over half of fifty percent of the county who voted it down...

i am surrounded...these are not my people and i am surrounded by them...

what would jesus do indeed...

methinks he wouldn't care if it was only two bedrooms and not much overall square footage.

x.

2 comments:

Veloute said...

I thought two parakeets were a lot of work! :o

We've got some of baseball mom's friends here. Sigh.

Kim said...

I found you through Pioneer Woman's comments and I am very much amused by your blog.
African Greys are not known for their friendliness, they are typically nasty birds if that helps any. My mom and step dad have own birds for years, two different cockatoos, a couple of macaws, and a lorikeet at various points in time, once there were three birds in the house. Right now they just have a macaw and a cockatoo. If you value you your ability to sleep and carry on phone conversations you will say no to birds.