Friday, February 03, 2006

guys, if you miss your mothers just give me a call...

so i'm on the phone with a male friend yesterday and we're chatting and all of a sudden i shout to the duke

"DO NOT THROW THAT BALL IN THIS HOUSE!"

"oh. my. god....you sound just like my mother!"

actually, i sounded just like rosanne barr...

"well they've both gotten soooo into sports lately and i can NOT keep them from tossing balls around inside!...footballs, baseballs, koosh balls...it doesn't matter!"

"oh, i remember doing that...my mom would tell me not to but i just couldn't help it"

"i know they think i'm just mean and no fun, but as an adult now do you see how reasonable a request it was for your mother to make?"

"oh, totally...but still, god i remember how hard it was not to...seriously, it was uncontrollable"

good lord, i do not know how in the hell i will survive...or how my 100 year old windows will...and it's not like we don't have space *outside* to throw things...

except that it's rained for like a million days in a row...

maybe i'll send them out to build an ark...that should keep them busy for awhile...

that sounds good...i'll get all biblical on their asses!!...parents do it all the time, why shouldn't i?...i could recruit god as my co-parent while the lord of the ring is away...idle hands and all that...it'll be great!

if i could only get them to learn how to turn water into wine i'm set!!

and now as the mother of two boys so into sports it's a little frightening, i am in that special realm of those who actually care about and therefore plan a superbowl sunday spread...i've even procured football shaped plates...believe me, i know...

it's amazing what having kids will do to a girl...it's a slippery slope i tell ya...and this weekend it looks like a slope paved with million dollar ads, cheese dip, and lots of beer...america at it's finest hour and i'm taking a front row seat...

where's janet jackson when you need her?

x.

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