my india, my america

can i say i have never in my life wanted to go to india?...i mean like it's actively on my list of places NOT TO EVER VISIT!

i love indian food and indian culture and have read so many lovely indian authors...but have never desired to see india...but since i've only been in north america i'm not so savvy a traveler...i'm an unadventurous wuss and rather soft...frankly, the thought of visiting india scares the shit out of me...i'd rather put my traveling energies towards a steering a pair of pretty but sturdy leather sandals towards a bottle of wine under the tuscan sun...

apparently, in addition to being unadventurous, i'm not a very imaginative traveler, either...but i don't care...you can't make me go to india!

on the other hand, the lord of the ring has been dying to go to india FOREVER!...he brought it up once early on and my reaction of vehement distaste was enough for him never to bring it up again...poor sot.

so you can see how he was understandably OVERJOYED upon learning that my dear dear dear friend auntieEN was marrying an indian gentleman and subsequently moving there!

here was his chance!...of course he assumed i'd put aside previous sentiments and want to visit my friend...if anyone could get me to go to india, it would be the promise of spending time with auntieEN...

auntieEN is the kind of person with whom one could spend time with being held hostage by terrorists in a rodent infested cave and still come away feeling as though you've had the time of your life...she quite simply, is the bomb.

so of course i'd want to go to india now!...his eyes gleamed he began to think aloud about the possibility of a trip...he was using 'we' a lot until i said

"um, have a good time and say hi to auntieEN for me"

poor sot.

anyhow, fast forward about a year and a half...i think that's how long she's been there?...i have desperately little contact with her as of late and miss her terribly...never enough to even entertain a trip there, but missed her nonetheless...

until last night...the craziest thing was i was sleeping and dreaming and having the loveliest time...my dreams are so real it's insane...and so subsequently i get these mini-lives so different from my own each night...

so i'm dreaming and i'm in india...and i saw myself there...and it was loud and busy and chaotic and lovely...and there i was on the street and in the cafe and in the market...and there was auntieEN...we were together in india...

i saw myself there and i liked it...i woke up and for the first time thought "i'd like to visit india one day"

then after i got up i picked up the phone to place a call and there was a message...i listened to it and it was auntieEN...calling from india...at midnight...i was asleep upstairs at midnight so didn't hear the phone...

but there she was...plain as you please on the message sending me love and greetings from india...

just like that.

it's funny when you shift inside yourself enough to change...even if it's just a small change...like where to take a trip...it's enough to remind you you're alive...and growing...still.

so maybe i will take a trip to india one day...maybe sooner rather than later...who knows?

i do know it would be really nice to see my friend again...

and to give her a clock set to west coast american time.

x.