just running about ramping up for the christmas festivities on the horizon...
there is someone here fixing our heater, A REAL HEATER FIXER PERSON...GASP!...so at least my christmas wish of being warm may or may not come true...
i don't hear much banging or swearing, though...not a good sign...for some reason when i hear banging and swearing while home repair work is being done it puts me at ease...
professionals...whatever...
and of course the lord of the ring made his way back to us and will be home for a week after christmas...
really, what more could a girl ask for?
don't ask.
anyhow, i'm making martha's eggnog again this year...it calls for 3 cups of bourbon, 2 cups of cognac, and 1/2 a cup of rum...
and that's just my serving!...buh dump bump!
no really, when i first saw martha making it on t.v. years and years ago, she was pouring all this alcohol in and said
"now i know this seems like a lot of alcohol...but really, if you just think about it like adding extra vanilla to a recipe for the flavor it makes sense"
i've been making it ever since...
but now i must go to target and the craft store two days before christmas in a demographic that must be seen to be believed...
if you don't hear from me by monday you must assume that i have been brainwashed and abducted and am somewhere in a christmas themed sweatshirt drinking some concoction of hot apple flavored liquor mixed with sprite and topped with whipped cream and gathered around an only slightly thawed sheet cake from the freezer where it's been staying since being leftover from my *new* sister in law's wedding the summer before that someone has cleverly written "happy birthday jesus!" on and because i've never gotten to before, they let ME light the candles!...then we all sing happy birthday to jesus and everyone claps...only the joke's on jesus because we get all the gifts...
happy kwanzaa
merry christmas
happy hanukkah
x.
Friday, December 23, 2005
Wednesday, December 21, 2005
oh. my. god.
so we have this advent calendar that i bought the year of the duke's first christmas...
as wingman got older, it became a fight as to who would open it each day...you'd think that the switching off of each day would work, but you think a lot of things and then you have kids and realize that you don't know doodly squat about anything...
so i thought i'd be brilliant this year and put out the traditional calendar PLUS get them each their own calendar with the chocolates inside!...
seemed like an easy solution...
except.
except, every morning since december 1st WITHOUT FAIL one of them in their excitement will blurt out what the chocolate shape is before the other one has even gotten theirs out...
and then all hell breaks loose...i bet intake at guantanamo bay is quieter than this...
when the duke blurts it out wingman just falls down into loud and dark and heaving sobs...
when wingman blurts it out the duke starts shouting and carrying on about the injustice of it all...also very loudly...
and so every morning since december 1st it's a jerry springer show in my living room...insults and hurts and sobs and shouts...if they could pick up and throw the chairs in there i'm sure they would...
and yes, there is always, at some point, an out of shape and angry and shouting woman in ill-fitting clothes involved...
and this was my *brilliant* plan...i'd hate to see what plan b might have been...
in other dentistry news we have decided that we are dealing with a buncha yahoos...duh...and this time i don't mean my kids...i have solicited advice from far and wide and have come to the conclusion that we will explore our options for taking him to a dentist at the children's hospital in the big city...
i don't know if we'll get an appointment or what my insurance will do or what...but it's a first step towards something i feel a bit better about...our insurance refused to pay for any of the hospital portion, but that might just have to be how it is...
i don't want to think about it but i have to...i am certain his teeth are only getting worse and obviously we want this resolved as quickly as possible...
i say as my son is chowing down on advent calendar chocolate first thing each morning...
in more uplifting news, today is the winter solstice...
as the sun comes creeping back, so too does hope...and as usual, just in the nick of time...
and hopefully i really can lay the past resentments of this year to rest and concentrate on what lies ahead...
so light every candle or even just one and give blessings to the return of the light...and while you're at it, give thanks for the dark too, as without it the light wouldn't mean half as much...
blessed be, x.
as wingman got older, it became a fight as to who would open it each day...you'd think that the switching off of each day would work, but you think a lot of things and then you have kids and realize that you don't know doodly squat about anything...
so i thought i'd be brilliant this year and put out the traditional calendar PLUS get them each their own calendar with the chocolates inside!...
seemed like an easy solution...
except.
except, every morning since december 1st WITHOUT FAIL one of them in their excitement will blurt out what the chocolate shape is before the other one has even gotten theirs out...
and then all hell breaks loose...i bet intake at guantanamo bay is quieter than this...
when the duke blurts it out wingman just falls down into loud and dark and heaving sobs...
when wingman blurts it out the duke starts shouting and carrying on about the injustice of it all...also very loudly...
and so every morning since december 1st it's a jerry springer show in my living room...insults and hurts and sobs and shouts...if they could pick up and throw the chairs in there i'm sure they would...
and yes, there is always, at some point, an out of shape and angry and shouting woman in ill-fitting clothes involved...
and this was my *brilliant* plan...i'd hate to see what plan b might have been...
in other dentistry news we have decided that we are dealing with a buncha yahoos...duh...and this time i don't mean my kids...i have solicited advice from far and wide and have come to the conclusion that we will explore our options for taking him to a dentist at the children's hospital in the big city...
i don't know if we'll get an appointment or what my insurance will do or what...but it's a first step towards something i feel a bit better about...our insurance refused to pay for any of the hospital portion, but that might just have to be how it is...
i don't want to think about it but i have to...i am certain his teeth are only getting worse and obviously we want this resolved as quickly as possible...
i say as my son is chowing down on advent calendar chocolate first thing each morning...
in more uplifting news, today is the winter solstice...
as the sun comes creeping back, so too does hope...and as usual, just in the nick of time...
and hopefully i really can lay the past resentments of this year to rest and concentrate on what lies ahead...
so light every candle or even just one and give blessings to the return of the light...and while you're at it, give thanks for the dark too, as without it the light wouldn't mean half as much...
blessed be, x.
Monday, December 19, 2005
it's been cancelled...
after CALLING AT BEDTIME giving me ANOTHER 11th hour run around about my insurance that i had FIRMLY SETTLED more than a month ago and giving me a near panic attack with the bullshit of who will pay and who won't and who said what and THEN getting me between a rock and a hard place so they can pirate me outta a LOT of cash up front they call back two hours later to CANCEL because the doctor doing the anesthesia has an out of state emergency...
this is getting very old.
this is making me very old.
somebody better put me under and hook me up because i am about to lose it.
he's four for gawd's sakes!...how in the hell can i keep gearing him up for something hellish and awful then calling it off?...
at least the winter solstice comes wednesday and there is hope...but until then i will pray for patience and understanding and whatever it is that will keep me from calling the woman at the dentist's office who let this get so screwed up in the first place even before the doctor cancelled and letting her know just exactly where she can put her forms...in triplicate...
thank you all for your good vibes...i will no doubt be soliciting them again soon...
x.
this is getting very old.
this is making me very old.
somebody better put me under and hook me up because i am about to lose it.
he's four for gawd's sakes!...how in the hell can i keep gearing him up for something hellish and awful then calling it off?...
at least the winter solstice comes wednesday and there is hope...but until then i will pray for patience and understanding and whatever it is that will keep me from calling the woman at the dentist's office who let this get so screwed up in the first place even before the doctor cancelled and letting her know just exactly where she can put her forms...in triplicate...
thank you all for your good vibes...i will no doubt be soliciting them again soon...
x.
wingman has his surgery tomorrow...
bah.
he is going in at 7:30 in the morning to have his dental surgery...he will be under general anesthesia for an hour to an hour and a half...the whole being put under thing is so worrisome...
i can be with him until he falls asleep then i have to go wait until it's all over...do i need to tell you this makes me crazy?...
it needs to be done, but i am still worried...
could you all send some good vibes to wingman tomorrow and keep him in your thoughts and prayers?...
it would mean a lot to me and hopefully counter act all my worrying...
x.
he is going in at 7:30 in the morning to have his dental surgery...he will be under general anesthesia for an hour to an hour and a half...the whole being put under thing is so worrisome...
i can be with him until he falls asleep then i have to go wait until it's all over...do i need to tell you this makes me crazy?...
it needs to be done, but i am still worried...
could you all send some good vibes to wingman tomorrow and keep him in your thoughts and prayers?...
it would mean a lot to me and hopefully counter act all my worrying...
x.
Friday, December 16, 2005
it's friday, it's sunny and freezing, and it's totally jive ass to be out in the middle of nowhere by yourself...
without going into great and in the end boring detail, the last two weeks of during the week single parenting have brought the year of during the week single parenting to a head...
in the normal day to day of caring for the boybarians, a hundred year old house, and my own at times grandiose yet fragile psyche i have had to involve the assistance of professionals on the outside...
namely the fire department and the emergency room...
both cases were false alarms...both cases were clearly, as i look back on them, scary and warranted action, but in the end were quote unquote nothing...
which has left me with the wondering of what is the lesson here?...because i am not usually given to "over reacting" in that manner, okay maybe i am...though i don't like the idea that i was "over reacting"...because when you are scared and are the only decision making person around, it's demeaning to label your decision as an "over reaction"...BUT i am NOT given to calling in the cavalry unless really really really needed...which is rare...
but these past two weeks i did...and might i just interject here that i would rather see the sea of hunky firemen in my driveway with understanding and sympathetic faces (one of them even touched me!!! oh joy oh rapturous joy!! who doesn't love a fireman!) than the condescending emergency room doctor who clearly thought i was not only wasting his time but was probably doing it on purpose...he was, and i quote, a dick...
anyhow, it's not rocket science...people need other people around...especially when raising kids...and i don't mean you *need* to be married or have a partner, although isn't it nice when it works that way, i just mean there *needs* to people around...somewhere...
there is safety and a measure of sanity in numbers...well, depends on who makes up the numbers...at the very least there is someone to hold the kid when your arm gets to tired or to pour you a drink and sit with you while you drink it...to tell you you don't need the fire department you just need to do *this* or to sit with one boybarian while you take the other to the hospital in the middle of the night so everyone isn't out in the below freezing weather at all hours of the night...
i know far too many who don't have this on a regular basis...i am lucky that i have it when i do...and please do not mistake this as a complaint against the lord of the ring...because this situation too, shall pass...and above all, because he is a wonderful husband and father...the hardest workin' man in show business...
in the meantime, the new year approaches and i know i must do something differently...more than the usual resolutions of getting in shape, being nicer to parking attendants, trying to get out of pajamas before noon, refraining from making phone calls while drunk...you know, the standard...
no, this year i will add to the list...create a community...that's it...create a community...and i don't know how and it probably won't be easy in the demographic i live in, but i'll try...
i must remember that even though i sometimes feel like it, no man is an island...just so you know, i feel like the island, not the man...i don't like to mess around with quotes just for gender equity...it's just wrong...though i must say i'd like to be an island in that sea of firemen...oh, wait, did i just say that out loud?...
yesterday the lord of the ring and i celebrated the 11th anniversary of our first date...and as he was pulling a 15 hour day in los angeles and i was pulling a 15 hour day here, we have to wait to celebrate it together...
luckily we have all the time in the world...
enjoy your weekend...
x.
in the normal day to day of caring for the boybarians, a hundred year old house, and my own at times grandiose yet fragile psyche i have had to involve the assistance of professionals on the outside...
namely the fire department and the emergency room...
both cases were false alarms...both cases were clearly, as i look back on them, scary and warranted action, but in the end were quote unquote nothing...
which has left me with the wondering of what is the lesson here?...because i am not usually given to "over reacting" in that manner, okay maybe i am...though i don't like the idea that i was "over reacting"...because when you are scared and are the only decision making person around, it's demeaning to label your decision as an "over reaction"...BUT i am NOT given to calling in the cavalry unless really really really needed...which is rare...
but these past two weeks i did...and might i just interject here that i would rather see the sea of hunky firemen in my driveway with understanding and sympathetic faces (one of them even touched me!!! oh joy oh rapturous joy!! who doesn't love a fireman!) than the condescending emergency room doctor who clearly thought i was not only wasting his time but was probably doing it on purpose...he was, and i quote, a dick...
anyhow, it's not rocket science...people need other people around...especially when raising kids...and i don't mean you *need* to be married or have a partner, although isn't it nice when it works that way, i just mean there *needs* to people around...somewhere...
there is safety and a measure of sanity in numbers...well, depends on who makes up the numbers...at the very least there is someone to hold the kid when your arm gets to tired or to pour you a drink and sit with you while you drink it...to tell you you don't need the fire department you just need to do *this* or to sit with one boybarian while you take the other to the hospital in the middle of the night so everyone isn't out in the below freezing weather at all hours of the night...
i know far too many who don't have this on a regular basis...i am lucky that i have it when i do...and please do not mistake this as a complaint against the lord of the ring...because this situation too, shall pass...and above all, because he is a wonderful husband and father...the hardest workin' man in show business...
in the meantime, the new year approaches and i know i must do something differently...more than the usual resolutions of getting in shape, being nicer to parking attendants, trying to get out of pajamas before noon, refraining from making phone calls while drunk...you know, the standard...
no, this year i will add to the list...create a community...that's it...create a community...and i don't know how and it probably won't be easy in the demographic i live in, but i'll try...
i must remember that even though i sometimes feel like it, no man is an island...just so you know, i feel like the island, not the man...i don't like to mess around with quotes just for gender equity...it's just wrong...though i must say i'd like to be an island in that sea of firemen...oh, wait, did i just say that out loud?...
yesterday the lord of the ring and i celebrated the 11th anniversary of our first date...and as he was pulling a 15 hour day in los angeles and i was pulling a 15 hour day here, we have to wait to celebrate it together...
luckily we have all the time in the world...
enjoy your weekend...
x.
Wednesday, December 14, 2005
a wordy post about words...
this time of year always brings me back to two words that have so completely been flipped in their respective meanings by a large part of our society...you hear them correctly used in christmas carols, yet in today's culture they cause pause or giggles...
terrific and gay...
i know, sounds like the name of a particularly interesting blog, but i don't mean them together...
not that they can't or aren't used together, just for the purposes of this post i use them separately as examples of the same problem...
but, i defensively politically correctly digress...
the issue is their original definitions and usage, and how they are defined and used today...
take for instance terrific...the original and continued definition of
terrific adj. very bad
terrific means very bad...sure there are other definitions that suggest otherwise and its colloquial usage suggests otherwise but it is there in black and white that it means very bad!...the first definition...it is a derivitive of terrificus (latin) meaning frightful...
so when you hear
"gee the traffic is terrific" in song, it really means "good lord look at that traffic jam we'll never get there why in the hell do we go through this every goddamned year JUST to get to your mother's house and endure your awful relatives and the horrible food and your boozy grabby aunts! this is just TERRIFIC!! TERRIFIC i tell ya!!"
now gay...we all know what gay means...but the original definition is
gay adj. happily excited; merry
it isn't even until the 4th definition or so that homosexual is attached to gay...but there are hints and whispers round about the third definition when we get "given to social pleasure; licentious" (which is a REALLY great word...you should look it up)
so when we are told "don we now our gay apparel" we must imagine a bunch of people festively dressed for a night of holiday merriment...standard christmas lingo and nothing more...
though i'd really like to know what don is wearing...he he ho ho ho...
now that that's out of my little "box of slightly annoying yet completely irrelevant thoughts" i can move on...
word of the week!
a new installment i bring to you...i say "week" but in my own little world that really doesn't mean anything as far as an *actual* time frame when you can reasonably count on seeing it...
anyway...
word of the week is dedicated to the lord of the ring's mother, the artist formally known as many different things but is currently known as damma dinny...
now t.a.f.k.a.m.d.t.b.i.c.k.a. damma dinny used a word last night in conversation that makes me remember why it is i love language so much...
in the context of a conversation about this country's health care crisis, t.a.f.k.a.m.d.t.b.i.c.k.a. damma dinny used the word
jive ass
okay so it's two words...but really? jive ass?...is that not one of the ALL TIME GREATEST words in the history of words!?!... and i haven't heard it in so long it's like meeting up with a long lost friend for a couple of beers!...i LOVE this word!! (okay, these words)
jive ass...i could say it all day, i really could...and as a prize, to no one but myself really, for winning word of the week i commit to using jive ass in conversation for the next bit of time AS MUCH AS HUMANLY POSSIBLE!!!
i should be very interesting to talk with for about the next week or so...though christmas is coming up and there is an audience I MEAN GATHERING so i may have to extend the time frame of the prize for a bit longer...
it's like a christmas gift that keeps on giving...
i haven't abandoned $1 menu tao but sadly i am out of time for today...
i wonder if you'd find jive ass in the tao te ching?
you know it's in the bible though!...but i think it's pronounced differently...hmmm, i'll have to ask mel gibson about that...
x.
terrific and gay...
i know, sounds like the name of a particularly interesting blog, but i don't mean them together...
not that they can't or aren't used together, just for the purposes of this post i use them separately as examples of the same problem...
but, i defensively politically correctly digress...
the issue is their original definitions and usage, and how they are defined and used today...
take for instance terrific...the original and continued definition of
terrific adj. very bad
terrific means very bad...sure there are other definitions that suggest otherwise and its colloquial usage suggests otherwise but it is there in black and white that it means very bad!...the first definition...it is a derivitive of terrificus (latin) meaning frightful...
so when you hear
"gee the traffic is terrific" in song, it really means "good lord look at that traffic jam we'll never get there why in the hell do we go through this every goddamned year JUST to get to your mother's house and endure your awful relatives and the horrible food and your boozy grabby aunts! this is just TERRIFIC!! TERRIFIC i tell ya!!"
now gay...we all know what gay means...but the original definition is
gay adj. happily excited; merry
it isn't even until the 4th definition or so that homosexual is attached to gay...but there are hints and whispers round about the third definition when we get "given to social pleasure; licentious" (which is a REALLY great word...you should look it up)
so when we are told "don we now our gay apparel" we must imagine a bunch of people festively dressed for a night of holiday merriment...standard christmas lingo and nothing more...
though i'd really like to know what don is wearing...he he ho ho ho...
now that that's out of my little "box of slightly annoying yet completely irrelevant thoughts" i can move on...
word of the week!
a new installment i bring to you...i say "week" but in my own little world that really doesn't mean anything as far as an *actual* time frame when you can reasonably count on seeing it...
anyway...
word of the week is dedicated to the lord of the ring's mother, the artist formally known as many different things but is currently known as damma dinny...
now t.a.f.k.a.m.d.t.b.i.c.k.a. damma dinny used a word last night in conversation that makes me remember why it is i love language so much...
in the context of a conversation about this country's health care crisis, t.a.f.k.a.m.d.t.b.i.c.k.a. damma dinny used the word
jive ass
okay so it's two words...but really? jive ass?...is that not one of the ALL TIME GREATEST words in the history of words!?!... and i haven't heard it in so long it's like meeting up with a long lost friend for a couple of beers!...i LOVE this word!! (okay, these words)
jive ass...i could say it all day, i really could...and as a prize, to no one but myself really, for winning word of the week i commit to using jive ass in conversation for the next bit of time AS MUCH AS HUMANLY POSSIBLE!!!
i should be very interesting to talk with for about the next week or so...though christmas is coming up and there is an audience I MEAN GATHERING so i may have to extend the time frame of the prize for a bit longer...
it's like a christmas gift that keeps on giving...
i haven't abandoned $1 menu tao but sadly i am out of time for today...
i wonder if you'd find jive ass in the tao te ching?
you know it's in the bible though!...but i think it's pronounced differently...hmmm, i'll have to ask mel gibson about that...
x.
Tuesday, December 13, 2005
our lady of guadalupe...
yesterday was the catholic feast day for our lady of guadalupe...
while i am not catholic, guadalupe is one of my all time favorites and constants...she brings me comfort daily, but i especially like to think of her on december, 12th...
in fact, the only photo i have of the lord of the ring and me (and i know that sounds like it should be the lord of the ring and *i* but i am just now teaching compound subjects and compound objects to the duke and it is in fact grammatically correct...even though i fall quite short in any sort of traditional rules of written communication, i do feel the need to attempt to practice what i teach...but, i digress)
so the photo in question is the *only* photo ever taken of the lord of the ring and me before i got pregnant the first time...which is only a distinction of any importance in that we actually look like *us*, rather than the shiny faced and sturdy peasant girl and the beefy marine that we somehow morphed into during pictures of my pregnancy and beyond...AND it just happens to be taken in mexico in front of the church of our lady of guadalupe in ON december, 12th!!..
ANYHOW, continuing on with why i am writing this post other than i LOVE guadalupe, is that i am preparing a meal in honor of the feast day...only it's a day late due to the fact that i am about a day late in life right now...
we are having
chicken and cheese tamales
rice and beans
guacamole
salsa
chips
and for desert homemade mexican hot chocolate and pastelitas de boda or mexican wedding cakes...which are actually cookies...they are so easy and so delicious...
i am preparing everything from scratch which only gives me pause when i think of the tamales...i have never made tamales and have always wanted to...i am a bit nervous about getting the wrapping right, but i chose the largest of the dried husks i got and feel like if i give myself plenty of room to work with i'll get the hang of it...that's the hope, anyway...
i've got the beans cooking and the husks soaking and the chicken is already done and ready to go for the tamales...but there's still everything to do...
i hope you enjoy the day and i will include you in my prayers of thanksgiving to guadalupe...
x.
while i am not catholic, guadalupe is one of my all time favorites and constants...she brings me comfort daily, but i especially like to think of her on december, 12th...
in fact, the only photo i have of the lord of the ring and me (and i know that sounds like it should be the lord of the ring and *i* but i am just now teaching compound subjects and compound objects to the duke and it is in fact grammatically correct...even though i fall quite short in any sort of traditional rules of written communication, i do feel the need to attempt to practice what i teach...but, i digress)
so the photo in question is the *only* photo ever taken of the lord of the ring and me before i got pregnant the first time...which is only a distinction of any importance in that we actually look like *us*, rather than the shiny faced and sturdy peasant girl and the beefy marine that we somehow morphed into during pictures of my pregnancy and beyond...AND it just happens to be taken in mexico in front of the church of our lady of guadalupe in ON december, 12th!!..
ANYHOW, continuing on with why i am writing this post other than i LOVE guadalupe, is that i am preparing a meal in honor of the feast day...only it's a day late due to the fact that i am about a day late in life right now...
we are having
chicken and cheese tamales
rice and beans
guacamole
salsa
chips
and for desert homemade mexican hot chocolate and pastelitas de boda or mexican wedding cakes...which are actually cookies...they are so easy and so delicious...
i am preparing everything from scratch which only gives me pause when i think of the tamales...i have never made tamales and have always wanted to...i am a bit nervous about getting the wrapping right, but i chose the largest of the dried husks i got and feel like if i give myself plenty of room to work with i'll get the hang of it...that's the hope, anyway...
i've got the beans cooking and the husks soaking and the chicken is already done and ready to go for the tamales...but there's still everything to do...
i hope you enjoy the day and i will include you in my prayers of thanksgiving to guadalupe...
x.
Wednesday, December 07, 2005
alles gute zum geburtstag!
today i will cook my father a birthday dinner in honor of his birthday this saturday...
in celebration of his his german heritage i am making the following:
rouladen
sauteed red cabbage
potato dumplings
sour cream gravy
german chocolate cake
and to round it all out a delicious and heady german beer served up in big old heavy steins...
now the cake has already surprised me in that when i think of german chocolate cake for some reason i always remember it as being kind of a heavy or dense cake...but it's not...the batter ends up being so very light in color, and the way it is constructed with a gentle folding of egg whites in at the end makes it a very light and almost fragile batter...regardless of the cup of butter!...
it also calls for a tablespoon of baking soda which seems like a lot, but works in giving the cakes that *fuzzy* kinda acidy chocolaty taste we associate with a german chocolate cake...
and seeing as the recipe for the frosting calls for 8 egg yolks and does a 10 minute cooking stirring kinda thing, not to mention the addition of neary 2 cups each of coconut and pecans i do believe it is the frosting that gives german chocolate cake it's heavy quality...
(i could make a really great joke here, but alas i am out of time for such pursuits)
today is also the birthday of le petit prince!!!...my darling little godson is a year old today and couldn't be more charming if he tried...of course with his parents he couldn't be anything but charming...and slightly off his rocker...
i have a child to collect from preschool, a child to haul through the rest of the school day, a latin test to administer, a frosting to make and a dinner to assemble so i am off...
enjoy the day and i'll save you a piece of cake!
x.
in celebration of his his german heritage i am making the following:
rouladen
sauteed red cabbage
potato dumplings
sour cream gravy
german chocolate cake
and to round it all out a delicious and heady german beer served up in big old heavy steins...
now the cake has already surprised me in that when i think of german chocolate cake for some reason i always remember it as being kind of a heavy or dense cake...but it's not...the batter ends up being so very light in color, and the way it is constructed with a gentle folding of egg whites in at the end makes it a very light and almost fragile batter...regardless of the cup of butter!...
it also calls for a tablespoon of baking soda which seems like a lot, but works in giving the cakes that *fuzzy* kinda acidy chocolaty taste we associate with a german chocolate cake...
and seeing as the recipe for the frosting calls for 8 egg yolks and does a 10 minute cooking stirring kinda thing, not to mention the addition of neary 2 cups each of coconut and pecans i do believe it is the frosting that gives german chocolate cake it's heavy quality...
(i could make a really great joke here, but alas i am out of time for such pursuits)
today is also the birthday of le petit prince!!!...my darling little godson is a year old today and couldn't be more charming if he tried...of course with his parents he couldn't be anything but charming...and slightly off his rocker...
i have a child to collect from preschool, a child to haul through the rest of the school day, a latin test to administer, a frosting to make and a dinner to assemble so i am off...
enjoy the day and i'll save you a piece of cake!
x.
Tuesday, December 06, 2005
lying and why you should do as i say and not as i do...
i lied to wingman the other evening and was questioned by the duke about it...
"mama, you lied to him"
now see here is one of those moments in parenting when you can go one of many ways...you can do the whole huffy puffy i am the parent do not question me! way or you can be an actual adult about it...
something i am not too familiar with, this being an adult thing...
but i gave it a shot...
"you're right i did lie...i told what i would call a white lie...it's when you tell someone something that is definitely not true, but does not harm them and in fact may spare them some pain"
"but it's still lying"
no flies on you, kid...
"yep, you're right...it is still lying...but as a parent and an adult sometimes you have to make a decision to bend the rules a bit...it's something you have to earn...wingman wanted to stay up and watch t.v with you...by telling him you weren't going to watch t.v he was satisfied he wasn't missing out...if he knew you were watching good eats and he had to go to bed he would be very sad and cry himself to sleep...he's tired and doesn't feel well and misses papa, i want him to go to bed and get some rest...not cry himself to sleep"
"so you told him that so he wouldn't be sad"
"right, it's still a lie...it still is not right, but it's a decision i felt i could make...because i am an adult and a mama and i was concerned for his feelings"
that seemed to be it for now...
accountability...wow, as these kids get older they really come into their own in the bullshit detector department...it's frightening this idea that i must be accountable as a human to my kids...
we assume as parents that we are *in charge*...and that's just the way it is...but it isn't...it isn't as kids grow and mature just like we want them to do....work so hard for them to do...but as they grow into their own people, they become part of the family in a way they weren't as babies and toddlers and little kids...they become part of the community of family...we expect accountability from them, and they expect it from us...
and this is how it *should* be (in my humble opinion) in a family...every one is accountable and therefore responsible for their own behavior...it's what makes a family work...
but it doesn't mean i like it...i don't like being under a microscope...i don't like being questioned or judged or told what to do or have any kind of comments made about my behavior or how i conduct my parenting, etc...
basically i am bitchy and controlling with a very healthy ego and my children's adolescence will likely kill me...
moving right along to today's $1 menu tao
time
the river, surging course,
uninterrupted current.
headwater, channel, mouth.
can they be divided?
each moment, whether it be from the past, the present, or the future is all part of a whole...we need the balance that comes from the continual flow of time...just as a river cannot be divided, nor can time be...
how do we know where we're going if we don't know where we've been and where we may end up?...
i would very much like to have a conversation with bush and cheney about this very subject...
that and how they manage to survive the adolescence of their own used to be teenaged children...i don't know much about cheney's kids but good lord those bush twins seem like they were quite a "handful"...
happy st. nicholas day...patron saint of children and all around good guy...in honor of him, go do something nice for someone today...
x.
p.s. don't forget a charlie brown christmas is on tonight at 8pm on ABC...it would NOT be christmas without it!
"mama, you lied to him"
now see here is one of those moments in parenting when you can go one of many ways...you can do the whole huffy puffy i am the parent do not question me! way or you can be an actual adult about it...
something i am not too familiar with, this being an adult thing...
but i gave it a shot...
"you're right i did lie...i told what i would call a white lie...it's when you tell someone something that is definitely not true, but does not harm them and in fact may spare them some pain"
"but it's still lying"
no flies on you, kid...
"yep, you're right...it is still lying...but as a parent and an adult sometimes you have to make a decision to bend the rules a bit...it's something you have to earn...wingman wanted to stay up and watch t.v with you...by telling him you weren't going to watch t.v he was satisfied he wasn't missing out...if he knew you were watching good eats and he had to go to bed he would be very sad and cry himself to sleep...he's tired and doesn't feel well and misses papa, i want him to go to bed and get some rest...not cry himself to sleep"
"so you told him that so he wouldn't be sad"
"right, it's still a lie...it still is not right, but it's a decision i felt i could make...because i am an adult and a mama and i was concerned for his feelings"
that seemed to be it for now...
accountability...wow, as these kids get older they really come into their own in the bullshit detector department...it's frightening this idea that i must be accountable as a human to my kids...
we assume as parents that we are *in charge*...and that's just the way it is...but it isn't...it isn't as kids grow and mature just like we want them to do....work so hard for them to do...but as they grow into their own people, they become part of the family in a way they weren't as babies and toddlers and little kids...they become part of the community of family...we expect accountability from them, and they expect it from us...
and this is how it *should* be (in my humble opinion) in a family...every one is accountable and therefore responsible for their own behavior...it's what makes a family work...
but it doesn't mean i like it...i don't like being under a microscope...i don't like being questioned or judged or told what to do or have any kind of comments made about my behavior or how i conduct my parenting, etc...
basically i am bitchy and controlling with a very healthy ego and my children's adolescence will likely kill me...
moving right along to today's $1 menu tao
time
the river, surging course,
uninterrupted current.
headwater, channel, mouth.
can they be divided?
each moment, whether it be from the past, the present, or the future is all part of a whole...we need the balance that comes from the continual flow of time...just as a river cannot be divided, nor can time be...
how do we know where we're going if we don't know where we've been and where we may end up?...
i would very much like to have a conversation with bush and cheney about this very subject...
that and how they manage to survive the adolescence of their own used to be teenaged children...i don't know much about cheney's kids but good lord those bush twins seem like they were quite a "handful"...
happy st. nicholas day...patron saint of children and all around good guy...in honor of him, go do something nice for someone today...
x.
p.s. don't forget a charlie brown christmas is on tonight at 8pm on ABC...it would NOT be christmas without it!
Thursday, December 01, 2005
go fish...
two new posts in two days!!!...where will the madness end!!!
i just want you all to know that when your child asks for a pet, say a dog or a cat or a hamster, be glad about their choices...my children, of course are whacked...
note the following conversation at breakfast this morning...
wingman: i wonder when we will get a new fish?
duke: mama, you know what pet i really want?
me: what?
duke: a ferret...i really really want a ferret
wingman: not me!
me: what do you want?
wingman: a macaw, of course
of course...because what child doesn't want a macaw?
a ferret and a macaw...now THAT'S what my life is missing!!!
good. lord.
and no way in hell am i going down the fish road again...the. worst. 9 cents i've ever spent...
so it's snowing A LOT and the boys are hoping there will be sledding in the back pasture today...could be enough by late afternoon...
in other news, do NOT make a whole batch of cinnamon sugar bread pudding in anticipation of sharing it with your husband IF said husband is a thousand and some change miles away...
trust me, it's an unwise plan at best...
today's $1 menu tao
positioning
heron stands in the blue estuary,
solitary, white, unmoving for hours.
a fish! quick avian darting;
the prey captured.
okay i got nothin'...because once again THE TAO KNOWS!!...i don't make this stuff up!!...it's there in it's order and it just always seems to fit because all i can see when i read this is the ferret and the macaw positioning themselves for the attack and i'm not quite sure who would come out the victor...a battle between a ferret and a macaw, hard to say but that would be something to see for sure...
which is making getting a fish look a WHOLE lot better...
which, in that round about way that all parenting roads wind eventually exiting at the lesser of two evils makes me look a WHOLE lot like the prey captured...
yup, that sounds about right...
x.
i just want you all to know that when your child asks for a pet, say a dog or a cat or a hamster, be glad about their choices...my children, of course are whacked...
note the following conversation at breakfast this morning...
wingman: i wonder when we will get a new fish?
duke: mama, you know what pet i really want?
me: what?
duke: a ferret...i really really want a ferret
wingman: not me!
me: what do you want?
wingman: a macaw, of course
of course...because what child doesn't want a macaw?
a ferret and a macaw...now THAT'S what my life is missing!!!
good. lord.
and no way in hell am i going down the fish road again...the. worst. 9 cents i've ever spent...
so it's snowing A LOT and the boys are hoping there will be sledding in the back pasture today...could be enough by late afternoon...
in other news, do NOT make a whole batch of cinnamon sugar bread pudding in anticipation of sharing it with your husband IF said husband is a thousand and some change miles away...
trust me, it's an unwise plan at best...
today's $1 menu tao
positioning
heron stands in the blue estuary,
solitary, white, unmoving for hours.
a fish! quick avian darting;
the prey captured.
okay i got nothin'...because once again THE TAO KNOWS!!...i don't make this stuff up!!...it's there in it's order and it just always seems to fit because all i can see when i read this is the ferret and the macaw positioning themselves for the attack and i'm not quite sure who would come out the victor...a battle between a ferret and a macaw, hard to say but that would be something to see for sure...
which is making getting a fish look a WHOLE lot better...
which, in that round about way that all parenting roads wind eventually exiting at the lesser of two evils makes me look a WHOLE lot like the prey captured...
yup, that sounds about right...
x.
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